'AWNIOGO': BURSLEM (A)

Cobridge traffic lights from above, with the site of the old Burslem ground in the extreme bottom-left

Sunday, June 18

Burslem. The very name itself conjures up a wealth of images: derelict factories, crime, seedy nocturnal activity, Port Vale supporters, dodgy backstreet pubs and hostile cricketers. A player from one of our opponents earlier in the season suggested that there are normally more animals around Burslem’s pitch than there are at Betley and Ashcombe put together. I don’t know about that, but all these factors make playing at Burslem’s ground a memorable, if sometimes potentially intimidating experience. After having had two poor seasons since they came fourth in section ‘A’ (most of which time has been spent mourning the loss of their beloved Dave ‘Foll’ Follett to Middlesex, via Leek), our ever amiable opponents appear to have a stronger side this year. We kept an unchanged team (for the first time this season) in the knowledge that a drastic improvement was needed if we were to come away with 20 points.

Addo won the toss and asked Burslem to have first use of a sluggish looking pitch that had the same brown tinge as the balti I had ‘recycled’ earlier that morning. A couple of rather indifferent opening spells from Iain and Mauler allowed Burslem to get off to an excellent start as they raced to 69 without loss in only 14 overs. It was a roasting afternoon, one in which concentration can easily waiver, yet we desperately needed to restore some discipline to our bowling as the game was already beginning to drift away from us. On came our two most dependable seamers, Seth and Coke, who ended up bowling a couple of marathon spells right through until tea. It was a staggering effort and exactly what was needed as, almost immediately, we clawed our way back into the game. During the two hour and ten minute period over which they shared 38 overs, only 85 runs were conceded whilst we picked up eight valuable wickets. 

View down Etruria Road: Burslem sightscreen just visible behind trees

First to fall was Burslem’s professional, Steve Lowndes, trapped lbw in Andy Hawkins’s first over. He didn’t appear overly thrilled with the decision but his complaints rang a touch hollow considering his tendency to thrust his pads down the line with his bat well hidden. Next, Rob Hewitt, who had been scoring quite freely, skied a catch to Harv at mid-off, clearly frustrated at being shackled by Cokey. With the inexperienced pair of Rowley and the younger of the two Lowndes brothers, Chris, at the crease, the brakes were squeezed still further. Rowley was dropped at cover by Bazzer but couldn’t take advantage of his escape as he crawled almost strokelessly through over after over. Eventually Coke’s metronomic accuracy forced Lowndes to nibble a catch to me, stood up behind the stumps, and to everyone’s surprise it stuck. Burslem were in danger of undoing their excellent start.

Colquhoun came in and attempted to pick up the run-rate but his efforts were nipped in the bud by an excellent catch at deep backward square-leg by Mauler which left them on 120 for 4. By this time Rowley realized he couldn’t go on blocking indefinitely and he ran down the pitch at Cokey. The ball bounced a touch, as well as leaving him off the wicket and I completed the stumping with what Coke described as “the touch of a rapist”. Kevin Beattie came in and looked in sparkling form for the one ball he faced, 129 for 6 becoming 152 for 8 by tea, with only the third Lowndes, Paul, remaining of the recognized batsmen. 

Kevin Beattie's birthplace

We felt it was important to polish them off pretty quickly after the break so as to permit ourselves as much time as possible to knock off whatever total Burslem could reach in their final eight overs. The score had moved steadily to 176 before Cokey took his sixth wicket, giving me a fourth victim as he lured Blood out of his crease with a fullish away-swinger. Lowndes was then snared in similar fashion to his eldest son, to leave us 70 minutes and 20 overs in which to bat. Although having the advantage of running downhill whilst Seth toiled up the bank, Cokey bowled admirably in the searing heat – particularly for a 42-year-old asthmatic! – to record figures of 22-8-50-6. I’m pretty sure he will have enjoyed the now customary pint that greeted him as he dragged his weary bones up the pavilion steps! 

If we could avoid any early catastrophe, the points were there for the taking against an attack that was certainly far friendlier in terms of ability than it was in attitude. They do seem to like to get themselves wound up over nothing, and at one point, when Steve Lowndes screamed aloud as though he had been shot in the kneecap, ostensibly because he’d got one to go past the outside edge, Addo advised him to “chill out, man. Enjoy it, relax”.

Amidst the chirping, we started solidly yet unspectacularly, reaching 30 without loss from the opening 10 overs. As there was nothing especially exciting happening to entertain an ever more sizable crowd (I refer you to the opening paragraph), I decided to amuse them by changing bats at the end of virtually every over. Not to be outdone, Addo decided to call for a sweater, then a cap, then had them both taken off. This constant coming and going of kit did nothing to help our concentration, nor the appalling over rate, and in the thirteenth over (unlucky for some) both the pro and I chipped catches to Paul Lowndes who was lurking on the mid-wicket boundary. It was ironic that, despite my incessant bat-swapping, the only shot I managed to time properly was the one which got me out! I stood my ground, unsure as to whether or not the ball had been grounded, but the umpires told me I had to go, so I did, albeit rather disgruntledly. Peeved at the home team’s go-slow tactics and annoyed at getting out, I turned to an old spectator who had been bellowing abuse at all of us throughout the afternoon and gave him a piece of my mind, hoping for peace of mind.

Back out in the middle, Harv, whose form was as sketchy as mine, got a pull shot high on the bat and dollied a simple chance to mid-on. With only ten minutes to go before the last 20 we were in a bit of trouble at 39 for 3, but this dismissal brought together Andy Hawkins and John Myatt for the partnership that won us the game. It has to be said that our skipper was none too confident of our victory chances at this stage; in fact he turned to someone in the crowd and said, with complete certainty, “we’ve blown it”, but the two batsmen set about some pretty average bowling with relish and the asking rate of 6.5 runs per over soon began to tumble. I imagined Seth telling John at one of their regular mid-pitch conferences, “All we need is one good over.” Whether he did or he didn’t, that is exactly what we got. Three of ‘em. These three overs yielded 39 runs; the victory post was moving steadily into view.

By now Mauler, who had started scratchily, was blasting his way back to form and had began to club sixes onto the Cobridge Road, the best of which was struck off the very first delivery of leg-spinner Rob Hewitt’s spell. Whether Mauler knew it was a googly, a flipper, a top-spinner or a normal leg-spinner is open to debate (it is probably debatable that Hewitt himself knew), but the ball nevertheless sailed out of the ground and into the forecourt at Ken Jervis’s Mitsubishi garage. All this time Seth had been stroking the ball around serenely and played the unrivalled shot of the day, a sumptuous back foot drive off Steve Lowndes. 

Mitsubishis: good memories (or not, as the case may be...)

When John holed out moments after completing his first half-century of the league campaign, and then Drew fell cheaply thanks to an unbelievable catch at long-off, it seemed that we might be spluttering in sight of the finish line. Not so: Andy guided us through to victory, scoring his own half-century in the process. However, the winning blow was fittingly left for 6-wicket Cokey and he clipped Chris Lowndes to the square-leg boundary to cap an excellent weekend for him and give us a much needed 20 points. 

How long ago it seemed since Moddershall 1st XI’s first ever game in the North Staffordshire and South Cheshire League, back in April 1990, when we came to Burslem, were called “Mickey Mouse” all day, yet still won the game having been bowled out for 112. Well, the boys from Disneyland came back and gave you a beating again!! 

MODDERSHALL WON BY 4 WICKETS 

BURSLEM 176 all out (58.3 overs) 
R Hewitt 39, K Colclough 6-50, A Hawkins 3-41
MODDERSHALL 177 for 6 (35.2 overs) 
A Hawkins 55*, J Myatt 53, C Lowndes 3-38, S Lowndes 3-60 

MODDERSHALL 20 points
BURSLEM 7 points