'AWNIOGO': KIDSGROVE (H)

"Come over to my side"

Saturday, May 20

For some reason or another, Moddershall versus Kidsgrove has become, of late, a reasonably tense fixture. If not quite a grudge match, then there’s definitely a certain edge to proceedings. This seems all the more bizarre considering that four of their players have turned out for Moddershall in the Midweek League. Be that as it may, I arrived at Moddershall early, among the first, and, psychologically ready to do battle, went to investigate the pitch. It looked reasonably flat but a little bit of grass had been left on, which, added to a hint of moisture, suggested assistance for both sides’ seamers. Considering our opponent’s notoriously defensive approach, it was especially important that we won the toss; unfortunately, Gary Stanyer called correctly and didn’t hesitate in asking us to have a bat.

With the ball darting around off the pitch, we began circumspectly. The main task was seeing off Stefan Read, Kidsgrove’s new professional, signed from our local rivals Meir Heath. Despite the physical exertion of running a half-marathon six times every over, Read bowled a probing opening spell with the new ball and gave me a Frisbee-sized bruise on the fleshy part of my thigh (people might counter that most, if not all of my ample thigh is fleshy). At the other end, Read’s partner, Steve Groom, bowled more like a bride and duly allowed Addo to inject some momentum into our innings as I struggled away at the other end. I managed to occupy the crease well enough, but my timing wasn’t there and I missed several opportunities to score off my pads, normally my bread-and-butter shot. Having launched him into the upper branches of the scotch pines three times last season, Mick Fairbanks’ introduction to the attack was therefore a welcome sight. Unfortunately, I was bowled through the gate by only his second ball having laboured to 29. 

report from the 1994 game: Richard Cooper in Chuckle Brother phase

Harv joined an Addo who was beginning to get into his stride and he immediately increased the tempo, being particularly severe on Dave Wellings. After a number of brutal strokes, Dickie holed out on 35 to leave us at 154 for 2 with only half an hour remaining until tea. Kidsgrove’s over-rate would have put the West Indies to shame and their field settings had, on the whole, been absurdly negative, with seven fielders on the boundary at times. Nevertheless, spoiling tactics or no, we had to score some quick runs before tea to enable us to declare. Addo took up the challenge and after completing his century from 130 balls, decided to really cut loose, smashing 5 fours and a six in the next three overs before being caught on the boundary. Mauler, clearly unhappy at coming in at number 5, joined Hawky for the last over before the interval and saw us through to the double-Nelson from 51 overs. Although it wasn’t quite as many runs as we would have liked, we realized that prolonging the innings any further would kill the game and, with this in mind, the declaration was made. 

Whilst Kidsgrove’s batting line-up is respectable enough, it contains few real explosive match-winners. We believed that a couple of early wickets – especially that of Wellings – would see Kidsgrove abandon any designs they might have had on overhauling our target. Shaun Brian shared the new ball with Billy as Mauler had spat the dummy over being dropped down the order. I sympathised with his disappointment over the demotion, particularly as he hadn’t done all that much wrong in previous games, but refusing to bowl is inexcusable. Hopefully John would soon come to his senses because he is an extremely important member of the side and would be needed on many occasions if we were to be promoted. 

Wellings would be with us the following year...
BACK: S Brian, Hawkins, I Carr, A heard, B Brian, D Stones, S Oliver
FRONT: D Wellings, J Myatt, J Addison, W Stones

Anyway, Barrington did remove Wellings early on, bringing the very much out of form Dave Leese to the middle, where he joined ex-Moddershall player Shaun Welch, who came to the club in 1991 from Porthill as a reasonably prolific opening batsman and left last year as a photographer. Hawky put him quickly out of his misery and then, after switching to the Road End, had Tellwright caught behind to plunge Kidsgrove in a bit of trouble at 79 for 3 with the last 20 approaching. Another couple of quick wickets would have put us in total command, but it was then that I made an embarrassing blunder that wouldn’t have looked out of place on You’ve Been Framed to let Leese off the hook. Addo had been bowling well at him, steadily applying the pressure until he cracked, attempting an injudicious sweep to which he got a top-edge that ballooned up in the air, slightly behind me. I’d like to think I would have caught it easily but, as I turned, Drew shouted “Barry’s!” I turned to look at Barry, fielding at slip, only to find him doing a pretty good impression of a statue, at which point I realized that I had to go for the catch. However, having taken my eye off the ball, I’d totally lost my bearings and as I looked up again I stumbled, tripped myself up, and came thudding to the turf about two yards from where the ball landed. Not cool… 

The score had moved on to 137 when Dickie Harvey whirled over his arm and hutched up both Leese (who had eked out a painstaking 47 from 119 balls) and the albino-like Andy Johnston inside ten deliveries. With only 7 overs remaining it was improbable that we could pull off a victory, but we kept pushing, more in the hope of collecting a couple of bonus points. Even though the 175 was there for the taking Gary Stanyer didn’t play an attacking shot in anger and amazingly decided to block out the remaining overs for the tamest of draws.

settling in to watch a bit of drying paint

It cannot be an especially thrilling experience playing (or watching) cricket at Kidsgrove when the captain’s philosophy seems to be that of avoiding defeat at all costs (unless this approach is just reserved for Moddershall, for some as yet unfathomable reason). To only make 163 for 5 from 49 overs on a fast scoring ground with a highly attacking field set almost throughout the innings borders on the pathetic. However, the onus is on us to overcome sides that play the game this way and moaning about isn’t going to change their approach.

In the immediate aftermath o the game I therefore concurred with Andy Hawkins’ opinion that the league should become 50 overs per side, winner takes all, and the sooner the better. On further reflection, though, I had to disagree. In Andy’s format, teams that bowl first will invariably go on the defensive from the first ball of the day and the game will become totally one-dimensional up until the last hour, when things will be sorted out in a still-formulaic ‘endgame’. Although nobody likes to play out boring draws, cricket, traditionally, is very much about having the capacity to out-think as well as outplay the opposition. Hopefully, the Powers That Be can find a manageable and fair resolution to improve the situation — perhaps by docking points from teams that bowl slow over-rates, by reducing the number of overs for the first innings to 55, or, better still, by imprisoning negative captains. 

MATCH DRAWN 

MODDERSHALL 222 for 3 dec. (51 overs) 
J Addison 128, R Harvey 35, M Fairbanks 3-72
KIDSGROVE 163 for 5 (49 overs) 
D Leese 47, A Johnston 33

MODDERSHALL 7 points
KIDSGROVE 5 points